This is Not Normal- Welcome to a New Year

 We made it another trip around the sun! I haven't quite figured out what that's going to mean for us this year, but this is not normal and we aren't gonna do this again for a third year. A third year of my kids wilting away inside the house because our idiot governor has said we have to wear masks inside and outside, we'll be fined for gathering in places, and there is no fun to be had EVER! There have been so many changes in life, for so many of us, that I thought that it was time to return to One Cheap Mother, largely because I've had to learn to be REAL CHEAP and thought maybe it could be helpful to some of y'all too. 

In trying to keep my head afloat the last two years, I've come to realize that writing helped keep me somewhat grounded. It helped me to get shit out of my head so that I don't have to make space for it in the long list of other things that still have to be dealt with, something that will constantly be a reminder as it loops through in my mental video of my check list. And if I'm being really real, writing things down gives me the space to work things out in my head and make sense of things, not that they always make sense, and be honest with whatever scary issue is at hand. Not to mention the actual remembering part. 

Like many of you, my main income, which has always come from doing street fairs, bazaars, and farmer's markets primarily as well as my website, were dashed with the unavailability of public gatherings. I feel like I've lived a constant episode of "Friends" when Ross, Rachel, and Chandler are trying to move the couch up the stairs. I have pivoted so many times the last couple years, between how to make money, how to become a teacher, how to make my special needs kids keep masks on, how to get school to respect their special needs in regard to their abilities in what they can do in school that isn't  at their grade level, getting my car registered, even some of the simplest things that you wouldn't think of have become a HUGE complication. So many changes- especially to my income and how I'm able to earn it, that like many, I often wonder now I'm going to make ends meet, which bills I can eliminate, or pay later if I pay it late, it's a dumpster fire. 

The last couple years I've also learned a lot about myself, my kids, and our likes and dislikes. We've grown as people- as one hopes to when you're forced to spend immense time with yourself when you're not used to. We learned what matters most to our hearts, that when your houseplants die, sometimes you can revive them, and that not everyone that we thought were friends, were only acquaintances that wanted to feel a bit more important or better people to us than they truly were. 

So, to say that I've learned to live cheaper than I was before, is the understatement of a century. I've learned to love deeper, and bigger, and the love you get isn't always equal to the love you give- and it's okay to be disappointed with that. "No" should be your favorite word and you should use it often. And that just because you're broke doesn't mean that you still can't have fun. I've learned to accept that I AM a hot mess. But I'm a fun hot mess, and I'll teach you to be a fun hot mess, too.

How To Make Colloidal Oatmeal For Cheaper Than You Can Buy It

I'm pretty sure that I've mentioned it quite a few times, if I haven't, it sure seems like it since I talk about it in my daily life, but Lil' G has BAD eczema. Pair that with his horrible, limiting food allergies and the kid has the skin of a zombie alligator. Seriously it's pretty bad. He always has scabs on his legs, and little red bumps everywhere from hives, itching, or just irritated skin because he's so effin allergic to life that his skin just can't handle it. He should be in a bubble, but I refuse! 

One thing that we can never be without in our house is colloidal oatmeal for baths, but that shit's expensive, yo! For a kid that needs it almost daily, it's really not practical to buy the Aveeno colloidal oatmeal powder for bath time since he literally needs it everyday, sometimes twice. Even if you don't have skin allergies, colloidal oatmeal is just great for your skin and leaves it soft and smooth. Seriously, this is the easiest thing to make ever, and you more than likely already have everything you need in your kitchen.

You Need:

• 1 cup unflavored rolled oats
• 1/2 cup baking soda
• Blender

Directions:

1. Combine ingredients in the blender. Grind until a fine dust forms. 
2. Dump ground contents in container with a lid. 
3. Use as needed in a warm bath. 

Simply place a few spoonfuls in the tub and soak. You don't need to rinse it off before getting out unless you have chunks of oatmeal stuck to you. The great thing about colloidal oatmeal is that the baking soda in the mixture will help to suck out any of the toxins or puffiness in your skin while the oatmeal helps to heal cracked skin and helps to replace and repair the elasticity in your skin. 

Happy bathing, y'all! I'm out!

Frugal or Cheap-- Which are You?

I will be the very first person to admit being frugal, boarding cheap. I have three boys. Three boys that can go through a $100 in fruit, milk, cereal, hot dogs, cheese, and juice. They are growing boys, but, I myself am on a fixed income, therefore, I have little money to spend on frivolous things I want. I am one cheap mother in the sense that I try to spend as little money as possible, because there just isn't much to go around as it is. There really is a huge difference in being cheap and being frugal though, most don't understand that and are actually cheap, like a large portion of the wealthy. One of the biggest differences in being cheap over being frugal, is that cheap people will often go to any lengths necessary to pay as little as possible, or nothing at all. Being cheap, in the long run, can actually hurt you more than it will help. Here are a few examples of whether you're watching out for your money, or just being a tightwad.

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1. You're cheap if you go to an all-you-can-eat restaurant and share plates with the family instead of letting everyone have their own. Your frugal if you go to a restaurant only on nights that kids eat free.

2. Your cheap, and probably a d-bag if you go to the food bank to pick up a box of food for your family instead of spending $20 to get you through until payday. You're frugal if you go to the dollar store to pick up some staples for your family until payday. Most dollar stores have an impressive food selection, and guess what guys?! It comes from the same stores you regularly shop at, it was simply their excess.

3. You're cheap if you buy all the expired food from the grocery store, risking yours and your family's health. You're frugal if you clip coupons and only buy what's on sale to save some money. Seriously guys, it's pretty douchey to risk everyone's health for some cheap grub.

4. You're cheap (and committing a felony, I might add) if you enroll in a welfare program to get free daycare and have no intentions of getting a job or going to school. You're frugal if you participate in daycare exchanges and/ or work from home to help cut daycare costs. Daycare is a crippler y'all! If you can work around your partner's schedule, or only during school hours, you're gonna save yourself a lot of money, stress, and grief. 

5. You're cheap if you sneak into the movie theater. You're frugal if you go to the theater on Tightwad Tuesdays where they give a discount to see whatever's in the theater. There are also a lot of smaller theaters that will play movies right before they hit DVD. It's a great way to have your choice of seat and a quiet theater!

6. You're cheap if you steal your neighbors cable. I mean, seriously guys, come on now. Are you really willing to do jail time over Game of Thrones?  We already know there's a lot of incest in the damn show! You're frugal if you set yourself up with Netflix and Hulu. Don't worry, I'll have a whole thing soon on the wonderfulness of Hulu. 

7. You're cheap if you try, and epicly fail, to make something yourself after undercutting the handmade artist that quoted you a price that was likely way lower than what you would pay any other designer for an item. You're frugal if you work with a designer within a set budget To get something you're pleased with. Seriously, in the long run this is always your best bet because you're not wasting money twice. 

8. You're Cheap if you don't change diapers often because you want to make them last as long as possible. I get it mamas. I do. Diapers are EXPENSIVE. But is risking your baby's health over more diaper changes worth that? You're frugal if you write to manufactures and receive coupons, buy the cheaper diapers, or hit offer up for those that other's can't wear anymore. You're really frugal if you can handle the whole cloth diapering thing. I can't stand the smell, and I'm not that kind of crunchy mama 

If you find yourself saying 'yes, that's me' to most of the first over the later, you, my friend, are cheap. This is not necessarily a good or bad thing. However, you may want to consider taking a look at why spending less or nothing more important to you. It is often off-putting to others when you are being an ass in an attempt to get what you want for as little as possible.  I really hope these examples are helpful in spotting the difference. 

After asking Mr. Handsome Face (my super wonderful boyfriend whom you will no-doubt hear about often) and a group chat with his gamer friends, it was determined that the only one that knew the difference was their female friend. Is this something lost on guys? Or are we just all being assholes to get what we want for nothing? What's your favorite cheap vs. frugal example?

Dollar Tree Birthday Deals and Deals NOT Worth the Money

My youngest is turning two in August and I have been starting to think about what to do for his birthday now since I have a lot of upcoming events and don't want to rush into crappy decisions with shitty, not so well thought out decorations. I'm thinking I want to do a space theme. When I start looking for birthday stuff, I always start at the Dollar Tree because they have a pretty decent selection that you can piece together for cheap.

Welcome to One Cheap Mother

Hey y'all! Welcome to my newest blogging adventure! I used to write for Because We're Cheap, but that blog has since died as it was jointly owned, and you know what they say about working with your friends, generally don't. Anyways, As the blog name suggests, I'm one cheap mother..